An American Writer's Thoughts on Japanese Animation

Worst-kept Secrets – Actually, I Am Spoiler Review

It seems to have been something of a theme this month to take on the idea of the hazy middle ground between “Harem” and “Romance” – two concepts that are deeply related (given that they both imply significant focus on romantic relationships) but that are very different in expectations. It happened somewhat for Love, Chuunibyou, and Other Delusions and it happened more pointedly for Chivalry of a Failed Knight and it is all over Actually, I Am.

I debated, in a big way, whether or not this show should be considered a Harem show. After all, I pointed out when trying to pick apart the tropes of the lazy stock Harem outing in Yuuna and the Haunted Hot Springs that lazy shows often have a clear “favorite” among the Harem. What I feel is the distinction, though, is that while there can be clear favorites, there’s not ‘supposed’ to be a clear winner, at least not until the thing is (mostly) over. And that is the crux of the question.

So, getting into the show, what even is the pitch for Actually, I Am? It involves a normal high school boy, Asahi Kuromine, who’s fallen for his classmate, Youko Shiragami. He goes to confess his love to her, only to discover that the cool beauty Youko is actually kind of a ditz with a natural thick country accent… and big bat wings, because she’s a vampire. She’s devastated by being discovered because that means she’d have to leave school, since a human found her out, but Asahi offers to keep what he’s learned a secret so that she can stay (not the least because he wants to have her around). The problem from there is, at least in terms of the pitch, that Asahi is singularly terrible at keeping secrets.

So, points on the Harem side: Youko is terminally dense, and doesn’t pick up any hints or signals. Ever. She’s so excited to have a friend that the idea of anything more seems like it will never occur to her, even as she draws massive and direct parallels between herself and Asahi and how her parents (vampire dad and human mom) met. This gives all the other girls a “fighting chance”… but point against, Asahi is essentially resolute in his interest and works towards being together with Youko the whole show, even if he can’t work up the nerve for a proper confession again. This isn’t just writer favoritism, it’s a choice from the main character even if the door remains open for him to go back on it.

So, who are the other girls? In actual contention there are really only two, three if you’re being generous. The first introduced as such is Nagisa Aizawa. She’s the class rep, and seems at first like a heartless stickler for the rules. She was also, apparently, Asahi’s crush before Youko, and shot him down in a devastating manner. She starts getting uppity, and ends up (thinking she’s already been found out) tipping her hand and revealing that she is, in fact, a tiny space alien and her “human” body is actually a mecha the real version of her (which looks exactly the same, but for the addition of an angler fish lantern on the real one) pilots. The exchange leaves Asahi having to keep her secret as well as Youko’s, and Nagisa functioning as a second point of failure (but, usefully, a second insider) for Youko’s secret. It also becomes clear that Nagisa has a terrible understanding of human society and culture despite her facade, probably did not understand Asahi’s former approach, and (as per harem tropes) is now steadily gaining an appreciation of him.

The other clear contender is Mikan Akemi, and at first she comes off as more of an enemy. She’s a normal human, but that’s only the icing on the problem cake. More critically, she’s the president of the school’s journalism club, effectively making her a bloodhound reporter… and beyond that she’s known Asahi forever and knows exactly how torment him so he’ll spill the very best stories if she gets her hands on him. She’s actually a kind of interesting take because she’s the equivalent of the childhood friend archetype, but she’s normally more like a childhood bully. So, naturally, Mikan largely serves as the failure state for our supernatural students: if she catches wind, as she usually threatens to, it’s game over. She’s not entirely untouched by the supernatural, though: Mikan’s glasses (fake glasses Asahi gave her when they were little kids and that she’s lovingly kept ever since) are possessed by a spirit of good fortune. Said spirit wants the best for Mikan, but doesn’t necessarily agree with her on what that is. How so? She has feelings for Asahi, and has for a long time, but is too afraid of rejection to even try to shift out of their current relationship. In essence, she’s locked herself in the phase where you show you like someone by hitting them, and her helper spirit wants her to speak her mind honestly and get out of that, often threatening to blow her secret for her.

These three girls are the core strength of Actually, I Am. Looking at the show as a harem show for now, going with the small number means each of the girls gets better development and has more of a clear niche. Youko and Asahi have the best basic chemistry, but it’s often more friendly than romantic. They’re very genuine when working together to overcome some of Youko’s hurdles (like getting her able to go out more in the day. Nagisa, however, gets better moments of romantic tension and is probably the best balanced of the heroines. Mikan, for her part, is a very interesting twist on her archetype with an extremely compelling background, but who’s underutilized (or poorly utilized) in the “present”, numbing some of that sympathy.

The fact that these three exist in a somewhat balanced system with Asahi is why I regard the rest of the characters more as ‘outsiders’ (similar to Asahi’s male friends that exist to fill space, but with more agency at times). They’re drawn and established as more of the show’s “girls” but they’re really not in the same setup as the main three.

The first of these is Shiho Shishido, Youko’s childhood friend who her father sends to check up on her. Shiho is a little odd in that she’s kind of two characters. You see, she’s a werewolf of sorts: both her forms (which she shifts between on seeing the full moon, including indirectly) are humanoid, even if one has some kind of feral traits, but they have different personalities. Shiho’s ‘main’ self is a dirty-minded young woman with a figure that turns all heads, while her other self is a burly wolf MAN with no sense of humor and a deep interest in Youko that she is far too dense to ever notice (one point on which he and Asahi can empathize with each other). We’re actually introduced to the wolfman first, and Shiho’s reveal is used as a surprise. Naturally, after an introductory episode, she ends up transferring into class. I called her a half-count because while she displays some interest in Asahi, it’s no more nor more romantic than she displays in anyone else. She’s just a perv, and calls herself as much.

At school, we find the other two also-rans, characters who will make it into cast montages and the promotional poster like they’re part of the “harem”, but who don’t actually belong to the same circle. They also know about Youko (and all the other supernaturals) and I feel it’s best to address the two as a unit. They are Akane and Akari Koumoto, the principal of the school and the main teacher for the rest of the cast, respectively. The principal is a devil, and looks like a pink-haired middle school girl with horns. She has phenomenal cosmic powers and uses them to be a complete troll as much as she’s able. The teacher is her granddaughter; mostly human, but still demonic enough to display at least some degree of super strength, which she often uses to thrash her grandmother when the latter acts out (the leitmotif the teacher has while enraged is enjoyably over-the-top menacing, too). The principal enters the scene fairly late, and the teacher is an extra until she does, and when they step up fully the tone and direction of the show changes in a big way, spending several episodes dealing with the principal’s mayhem (some of which threatens to destroy the world) rather than the everyday struggles of Youko trying to fit in and enjoy her life without being outed and losing her connection to the human world.

That’s basically the show as a Harem. As a romance, it becomes important to look at the plot (what plot there is). The steps, overlapping somewhat though they do, are roughly this: First, we need to meet everyone. Then, we spend most of our time working with Youko, trying to allow her to come out of her shell and really experience what it can be to live like a human, with friends, as she wanted to rather than as she was forced to by her circumstances. Then, we get the final arcs. First, the “Big misunderstanding” – Mikan’s glasses can wait no longer and speak for her, but she’s not the one holding them when the voice confesses to Asahi, Nagisa is, and at least Youko is fooled. She’s not entirely put out, though, and despite Asahi (and, against her own interest, Nagisa) trying to set things right, Youko tries to make sure they have a fun date, so she can do something for the friends who did so much for her. Finally, we get a short arc where Youko’s father finds out she’s beyond busted and comes to pick her up, leading to the gang traveling to her family home to ask for her to be released back to school. Ultimately they are, of course, successful (Dad’s memory gets erased – accidentally – with Nagisa’s alien memory erasure tool. Which, in a brick joke set up in the second episode, is indistinguishable from an ordinary hammer. Youko’s mom, for her part, seems to approve of things as they are and also have a lot of sway in the household). Status quo is ultimately restored.

In the end… I think this one falls on the “Harem” side of the divide, but because its harem game is strong, not because its romance game is weak. It is also a very high-energy and surreal comedy. A lot of the show depends on getting you to laugh at just how insane some of the setups are, like the principal calling down an earth-destroying meteor to avoid an unpleasant task, with the world reacting as the meteor approaches, stops, retreats, approaches, or gets confused in response to the principal’s current status. At another point, Youko’s father (while quite human in his youth) is now a twenty foot or so tall giant, who can still be forced into sitcom-style “henpecked husband” mode, and also seems convinced that he can still pass for ordinary. It seems like every episode included at least a couple dares regarding what the writers could get away with, in terms of supernatural madness and in terms of making Youko dense or her ‘secret’ blindingly obvious (she tans in a matter of seconds… but after much trouble it seems sunblock works).

To an extent, that makes the fact that the show threw up a competent harem impressive in its own right. A show that runs on madness the way this one does (Sleepy Princess in the Demon Castle for instance) doesn’t, strictly speaking, need complex characters or emotional arcs or motivations. Many of the jokes that seem to make up the backbone of the show would still land if the characters were their flattest selves… but at the same time, a lot of the interactions of the core harem would still land if there was little to no humor. Both are done well enough to stand.

Despite that, I think the show gets a C+ overall. I’d recommend it if you’re looking for a silly harem-comedy to pass some time, but nothing more than that. It rises to competence in multiple areas, which is worth noting, but it never really does go past average anywhere along the line.